The Sky's Still Blue
by bruninhagalle
Summary: Six months after the season 1 finale, Jane and Kurt are still struggling to find their way back to how they used to be. That changes when a strange man pays unwanted attention to Jane and the event forces the two of them to finally talk about everything that happened. Jeller all the way.


**A/N:** Who is alive after that finale? Since it aired I can't stop thinking about writing a fanfiction dealing with the aftermath of it so here it is! I hope you guys like it. I'd love to hear what you thought!

 **A big thank you to my wonderful beta reader Thaís Christ. Love you, girl!**

Both lyrics are from two different versions of a song called The Sky's Still Blue by Andrew Belle.

* * *

 **The Sky's Still Blue  
Kurt & Jane  
Angst/Romance**

* * *

" _You never see clearly, 'til you stop crying  
I never found it, until I stopped trying  
I stumbled upon you and fell thru the ceiling tiles  
I started a fire, to smoke out my treasons  
I tore down a building, to pick up the pieces  
And now on a clear glass wall, I can see our fate  
But it's a little too late."_

* * *

It's been six months since her world crashed upon her for the second time. Six months since her lies and betrayals were uncovered. Six months since she found herself in a FBI holding room, ready to tell the people she considered her friends all the ways she had conned them. Six months and sometimes when she closed her eyes at night, right before sleeping, she still could see the disappointment in all of their faces.

Especially in his.

After that day and Mayfair's files, they slowly realized she was as much a victim in all of this as they were. Patterson was the first to come around. Jane would never forget the random hug the agent gave her after a tough case. Or how, within the next days, Zapata invited her for a girl's night. Reade eventually looked at her without disdain, without telling her with each look how he was right about her all along.

As all of his agents started forgiving her, Weller withdrew from all of them. It pained her, during those months, whenever she watched him working from his new office, isolated from everything and everyone because of her.

He still remained active during a tattoo case, going out into the field with them and discussing theories and solutions to their problems. But that was all anyone could expect from him. Personal questions and invitations were not allowed and quickly dismissed by him.

Until she was shot in the lungs. Right in front of him. To save his life. She remembered with crystal clear quality the way his whole face changed from that moment on. How he held her and begged her to stay with him. How his eyes were filled with fear and regret and desperation. How he helped her through the recovery and how he never mentioned the previous months when he couldn't even look at her.

Soon she understood life had given her a second chance. A bullet that could have ended her life turned out to be her third (or fourth but who was counting?) new beginning. He stopped ignoring her after the incident. The way he looked at her almost resembled the way he did before his father's death, and her lies and Taylor Shaw's discovered body. They were painstakingly drifting towards each other again.

And that was the only reason she accepted coming to Sarah's farewell party tonight. Because she knew Kurt wouldn't give her the cold shoulder and if he could forgive her, Sarah certainly could too (or so she hoped).

Jane knocked on his door – a place she hasn't visited since the night they played with Sawyer – and was greeted by the child himself. He opened a bright and big smile the minute he saw her.

"Hi, Jane!"

She did her best to hide the shock his words caused her. So someone had explained to him she was not Aunt Taylor after all. And he seemed okay with it. She wished adults could process information as simple as he seemed to have done.

She pushed these thoughts aside and couldn't help but give the boy a warm smile in return (she started doing it again lately, just smiling).

"Come in!" – He held the door open for her and she ruffled his hair as she entered the apartment. – "Uncle Kurt promised me we are going to play Uno today. Will you play with us?"

She was thinking of how to answer the boy, ready to say no to him – she and Kurt could be closer than months ago but he might not want her hanging around his nephew more than necessary – when Sarah appeared behind the boy, saving her from disappointing the child.

"Jane!" – The women hugged each other and relief invaded Jane's whole body. Sarah was the last person she needed to see and check if things were alright between them. It appeared to be. – "So glad you could make it."

"Thanks for inviting me."

The two women spent the next minutes going around the living room, Sarah introducing Jane to some of her friends until they reached a little circle of people formed by her brother and his FBI team, Reade included.

They all greeted Jane with smiles and bright eyes, sincerely happy to see her and for the first time in a long time, she felt like she belonged there with them again.

* * *

They were all watching Sawyer impersonate some character from a cartoon he liked when a guy tapped Jane on the shoulder. She recognized him as one of Sarah's friend, the same one who had looked at her from head to toe, making her slightly uneasy.

"I couldn't help but notice I made you uncomfortable." – The man smiled apologetically.

"I uh…" – Jane looked around, trying to find a way out of that conversation. Her eyes locked with Kurt's, the same ones that were already on her and her companion. She knew that look and felt something warm spread through her. It was jealousy. Possessiveness. She had already convinced herself she would never see that again. Not on his face. Not ever. But it was there and she almost couldn't contain a smile. – "It's fine, really. I'm used to it."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I just found your tattoos fascinating and it reminded me of the ones I used to have."

"Used?"

"Yeah. Bad decisions in my teen's." – He shrugged and smiled again. A beautiful, charming smile. Jane felt herself blushing and hoped to God Kurt wasn't looking their way. – "I'm Matthew." – He extended a hand and Jane shook it.

"I'm Jane."

"Well, Jane, just wanted you to know I wasn't judging you. You are a very beautiful woman." – He raised his glass to her. – "But if all these tattoos make you uncomfortable, I might be able to help you. I have good contacts." – She nodded as his sipped his drink. – "I'll be hanging around here for a while. If you need these contacts, just let me know. Or you can call me another time." – He pulled out of his shirt pocket a business card and wrote his personal number for her.

"Thank you."

"You are welcome."

And with that, he vanished. When she turned to her friends, Sawyer was gone and Patterson and Zapata were looking at her with sly smiles on their faces.

"I gotta say, Jane," – Zapata approached her, talking loud enough so a certain FBI agent could hear. – "That man is really handsome and totally into you."

"He is only interested in my tattoos." – Jane defended, not daring to look at Weller. Her face was probably all red.

"That's why he gave you his personal number? Because he is only interested in your tattoos?" – Zapata laughed at the look on her friend's face and left the group to get a new beer, Reade shaking his head ad following her.

"Zapata is right, Jane." – Patterson said softly, her hand briefly touching Jane's arm. – "You are allowed to have a man's attention, okay? Enjoy it." – The blond analyst also left, Dr. Borden beside her as they also went to refresh their drinks.

Jane had no choice now but to look at Weller and she inwardly cursed her friends for leaving them alone. He was again already looking at her, a contemplative expression on his face.

"I'll uh… I'll get more beer. Do you want some?" – Her beer can was still half full but he didn't need to know that.

She was walking away from him and towards the kitchen before he could fully reply no.

* * *

The fresh wind blowing on her face and the silence around her were a welcoming change from the noise inside the apartment. The balcony was empty and she was enjoying the feeling of being alone there with that splendid view of the New York City.

After grabbing a new beer, she made small talk with Sarah – who hadn't witness her whole exchange with Matthew and couldn't tease her with secret smiles and knowing looks – and when that was done, she ended up there, one part of Kurt's home she hadn't been yet.

With her arms resting on the protective rail, her mind drifted back to Matthew's words.

Did she want to get rid of the tattoos? Once Patterson suggested she could do whatever she pleased with her own body.

Did she want to erase everything that brought her to this life? Erase a part of her that could bring extremely good memories but at the same time, terrible, terrible mistakes? Did she?

She loved and hated the tattoos with equal force.

She was so caught in her own thoughts she didn't notice the door sliding in to let another person into the balcony.

"Are you okay, Jane?"

She gasped, turning around with wide eyes at the sound of his deep voice. Why did he have to follow her there?

 _Well, at least it isn't Matthew again._

His eyes searched her face and she wished she hadn't separated herself from the others that way. Now it was only the two of them, and even after the shooting, they still haven't regained their balance, their ease banter. There was still tension between them and so many unsaid things that somehow she still waited for the moment he would snap at her again, accusing her of all the horrible things she was guilty of. She'd still deserve it. She'd always deserve it all.

Some other times she caught him staring at her the way he did before finding her true colors but she never let herself hope. She had broken them in an irreparable way and erased from her mind any idea of the two of them being something other than friends.

"I'm fine. Just uh… thinking."

"About the tattoos?"

She looked down at herself as he did the same. He would never get tired of her tattoos. They were beautiful.

She was beautiful.

"Yeah, about the tattoos." – She seemed to think of elaborating but the words got stuck on her throat. They didn't have that kind of relationship anymore, where she could talk about what bothered her, or scared her, and he would comfort her with the right words and his amazing arms.

"There is nothing wrong with your tattoos. You know that, right?"

He sounded so sincere she almost wanted to cry, especially after all the pain these same tattoos brought him.

"How can you say that? These tattoos," – She pointed at them, her incredulity clear in her voice. – "They caused you and the team so much pain and loss. I… I caused so much pain and loss." – She felt her eyes stinging with soon to be tears and her lips trembled.

 _Get a grip, Jane!_

This wasn't the time and place for this conversation.

"Jane…" – He took a step towards her but stopped. How he missed the days when he didn't hesitate before touching her.

"It's true, Kurt. Look at all the damage they've done. I just," – She took a deep breath before staring him straight in the eyes. – "I just wish you've never met me."

He was so shocked by her words that nothing came out of his mouth, so she continued.

"David would still be alive. And Mayfair. And,"

"And thousands of people would be dead without you!" – He took another step, closing more of the distance between them but not crowding her. – "These tattoos saved a lot of lives, Jane. They still do. Every day."

"After everything that happened, I'm not sure it's worth it anymore."

He wanted so much to grab her and shake her. Make her see she was just another pawn in someone's game. Like they all were from the beginning. She had to stop blaming herself so she could move on. And he realized maybe he was the only one who could help her do it and make her see how wonderful she was, tattoos included.

Why the hell did he have to be so damn bad at communicating? Haven't she saved his life, without a second thought, to prove for once and for all she was by his side? Not that she needed to prove anything but the episode reminded him of not taking her for granted.

"I think you are wrong, Jane." – He looked over his shoulder, in the direction of the living room, and realized no one was paying them any attention. Making a decision, he took her by the arm – the simple touch sending an electric shock through both of their bodies -, and moved them to a more hidden and private place in the balcony.

"What are you doing?"

He released her and took a step back. Any closer and he wouldn't be able to prevent himself from kissing her senseless until she believed everything he was about to say.

"You are wrong, Jane." – He ignored her question and continued his argument. – "The good things we've done since finding you, the amount of people we've saved and locked behind bars, it's always going to be worth any bad thing that happened."

"You don't get it, do you?" – She sighed. He was always so selfless. – "None of this matters to me when I think of how much I hurt you. It killed me, Kurt, _it killed me_ to see how much you suffered. That's why you'd be better off not knowing me at all." – Her eyes were watering again and while part of her brain was telling her to tough up, the other part was convincing her she had nothing more to hide.

"I will never regret you, Jane."

The tears actually spilled upon hearing his words.

 _Damn him._

"Except you did, Kurt. I could see it in your face when you realized what I've done, when you realized I was not Taylor."

It broke his heart that she thought of herself that way.

"No. I was a lot of things back then but I don't remember ever regretting meeting you. Yes, I was very mad at you and disappointed because of the way you lied to our faces but you've seen Orion's files. You were manipulated just as much as we were. Stop blaming yourself for everything."

She wiped some more tears and was about to speak when he lifted a finger, telling her he was not done.

"About Taylor," – She felt her stomach drop. This was the part of the conversation she never wanted to reach, never wanted to hear him say how all the things he'd done with her and for her were because he thought she was his best childhood friend. – "I've stopped seeing you that way a long time ago, Jane. Sometimes an occasion reminded me of her and I'd share it with you, hoping it would help you remember something but I was doing that for you. Maybe a little for me, but mostly for you. It didn't matter who you were. It _doesn't_ matter who you are. You are Jane. Just Jane. My disappointment had everything to do with my father and nothing to do with you."

She searched his eyes, looking for something that would betray these words, this truth that was setting her free. She found nothing, only his honesty shining back at her.

"So everything that happened between us," – She averted her eyes, feeling her cheeks reddening all over again , now in a much more pleasant way. He had to know exactly what all the things she was referring to. – "It wasn't because you thought I was Taylor?"

Kurt smiled a genuine, soft smile for the first time in what felt like years.

"No, Jane. It was because you were you. Jane. Just… Jane."

She smiled through her tears. He had no idea but a weight had just been lifted from her heart. She had forced every meaningful moment between them to the back of her mind. His protective way, his hearty eyes, his hugs, their kisses, it was all because she was Taylor. He'd never open himself that way if she wasn't. But now she learned she was wrong.

He had liked her all along.

Her.

 _Jane._

"Can I hug uh… Can I hug you?"

She was in his arms before she had time to finish her question. His solid body against hers and his strong arms around her were like coming home. As if a part of her was finally back in place.

"You never have to ask." – He whispered in her ear.

"I'm sorry. After everything, I was not sure you'd like one from me." – She whispered back.

"I forgive you, Jane. Let's move on from all of that." - He felt her fist his shirt and tighten her hold on him and he did the same, pulling her impossibly closer.

She laid her head on his shoulder and they stayed like that for minutes, just finding each other again.

"I hope you know all of our moments meant the world to me, Kurt. They were never a lie or a part of their game. It was just ours."

He nodded against her head and seconds later pulled back, looking her in the eyes. His serious expression made her heart race.

"Was it like that with him too?"

She gaped, not expecting him to bring Oscar into this but fully aware they needed to get his ghost out of their way in order to truly move on.

"No. It was… complicated." – She admitted, decided to tell him the truth. No more lies. – "I remembered him and some of what we had together but most importantly, he knew who I was before all of this. He was the only one who did. When I started lying to you and the team, I suddenly didn't know who I was anymore. Was this new version of me a mole? An asset? Part of the FBI? When I was with him, and he shared what he felt for me or things I liked, I felt like I could be at least that someone he was talking about. Because I actually was, for him."

She watched as he processed her words, hoping to God they made sense to him.

"Did you love him?"

"No." – She replied so fast and without faltering that he almost smiled. – "I only had memories of him, not of what I felt for him. My heart was someplace else."

She smiled shyly and looked at anywhere but him.

His hands on her face surprised her and when she found his eyes, they were much closer than she expected. There was a mega watt smile in his face she hadn't seen in ages. She thought maybe she just had lifted a weight from his heart as well.

"Can I kiss,"

Her lips were on his before his next breath and soon he caught up with her, kissing her as if he was a starving man. Their first kiss was tender, unsure. Their second one was sweet with a touch of desperation on her part. This one was something else entirely.

He was devouring her. He didn't care who could catch them in that situation. It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was her lips moving against his, and the way her tongue was battling with his for the first time. Or how absolutely fantastic was the sound of her moan when he backed her up against the wall and pressed her against it with his body.

They were panting heavily when they finally let go of each other, a sheepish smile in their flushed faces.

"You never have to ask." – She echoed his words back at him and laughed when he leaned in to steal another kiss.

They knew they still had a lot to sort through and nothing was defined between them and their future but of one thing they were sure: if this was another starting point, they were glad to be in this moment together.

* * *

" _We drew up a landscape_ _  
_ _We climbed down a ladder_ _  
_ _Carved out a memory_ _  
_ _To follow the pattern_ _  
_ _And now on a clear glass wall_ _  
_ _I can see my faith_ _  
_ _You know it's never too late."_


End file.
